How three senior travel leaders learned to stop 'trying to have it all'
Emotions ran high at the Advantage conference on Thursday (16 May) as three senior leaders shared the personal and professional struggles and anguish they have overcome to achieve a better work-life balance.
Celebrity Cruises senior sales director EMEA Claire Stirrup, Royal Caribbean International vice-president EMEA Ben Bouldin and Meon Valley Travel managing director James Beagrie all agreed the pandemic had to some extent reset expectations in their professional lives.
The trio addressed delegates during a break-out session entitled "Leadership – can you really have it all?" with all three of the panellists admitting they had at some point in both their careers and personal lives had in their own ways been guilty of trying to have it all.
The turning point for all three panellists followed clashes of the personal and professional, with Stirrup, Bouldin and Beagrie all openly admitting they had – at times – allowed the demands of their chosen careers take precedence.
Their frank admissions offered an eye-opening insight into the challenges faced by some of travel’s best known senior figures – this is what they had to say, and the advice they had to share.
Claire Stirrup
Stirrup said as a career-driven woman and single mother who was "holding it together" that she was happy with where things were going until she tried to work through a major change in her son's circumstances. "I thought I needed to show I could do it all," she said. This culminated in her nearly crashing her car at which point she had a open and honest discussion with her employer and went part-time. "My all took me time to realise," Stirrup added. "I did the right thing."
James Beagrie
Beagrie spoke openly for the first time about how he was responsible earlier in his career for a major business deal falling through costing him £8 million, which came at major detriment – particularly – to his family. "I thought, 'I've got this' – it was Jesus syndrome," he said. "It hurt. I was gratified to be surrounded by people who came to me. Things resonate with me differently now." Reflecting on how this has informed his approach to business now, Beagrie said – particularly in the wake of the pandemic – he had thrown away how many of the ways in which he previously did things and, at 62, had reset his approach around integrity, authenticity and honesty.
Ben Bouldin
Bouldin, meanwhile, spoke honestly about how his commitment to his work saw him travelling 80% of the time, spending very little quality time at home. "I lost sight of what my family needed," he said. "I went on holiday with my two-year-old with my two-year-old and he wouldn't sit on my lap because he didn't know me. The thing I struggled with was having balance – that's a constant struggle. You get stuck on the treadmill of life." Bouldin and his family subsequently relocated to Scotland to be closer to a family support network. "I used to live 10 miles from the office so I was never physically or mentally away from work," he added.
Moderator John Sullivan, Advantage's head of commercial, asked the panellists to rank out of 10 how well they were achieving the balance they had for so many years not managed to reach.
Beagrie said the pandemic has served "as a reset button" pushing people back to their families. "Now I'm surrounded by people that inspire other people," he said, adding this included his children, who have come into the business.
Stirrup said she was always striving for a 10, but gave herself a nine. "We're not going to have it all every day," she said. "I'm much kinder to myself... but there's always room for improvement."
Bouldin, by contrast, gave himself a six, acknowledging the nature of his job meant frequent travel was inevitable but stressing he felt his experiences had seen him mature as a person.
Pandemic reset
All three panellists spoke of the personal boundaries they've since set themselves. Beagrie said he and fellow director Karen Beagrie had a 50:50 rule on kindness.
"We have to to make 100%," he explained, highlighting how on tougher days for one than the other, the split could be 60:40 or 70:30. If we can't [make 100%], we have to work out how we get through the day and be kind to each other."
Stirrup touched on Celebrity's a no emails after 1pm on Fridays policy, adding that if she opted to work at weekends for her own convenience, there was never any pressure on colleagues to respond out of hours. "You can't pour from an empty cup," she added.
Bouldin, meanwhile, has stopped participating in calls after 9pm in the week, and advised delegates never to do a job they don't love. He added the pandemic had, to an extent, reset expectations within corporate culture, allowing him to focus more on switching off during his weekend quality time.
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