'Let’s all take a leaf out of Mel’s book and go forward with open hearts and minds'

Mel told me she had felt “different” since the age of 13, but it wasn’t until she joined Funway in her early forties that she believed she had reached a level of maturity that allowed her to be “confident in being authentic” and to overcome her fears of confronting her gender.

It struck me that, in typical Mel style, she was again putting the thoughts and feelings of others before her own. “The approach I take to my work – methodical, planned and considered – was the one I took to my transition,” she explained. “I’m pleased it was because rushing, and forcing acceptance, doesn’t end well.

“If you abuse society by fighting it and presenting an image that is not in that binary environment – such as walking into work in a beard and a maxi dress – they will kick you back. It’s about working together to increase understanding. Society has come a long way, but there is still much to do for true acceptance of transgender people.”

Giving back – and ‘giving forward’

This idea of collaboration was a key part of Mel’s advice to both employees and employers on trans issues. For employees, she counselled against “punishing people” if they occasionally got a pronoun wrong, or referred to someone by their old name.

“You have to take a step back and accept this is an experience for them too,” she said. “You want people to embrace and accept you – if you then slap them back every time they make a small indiscretion, they don’t know how to act around you.

“Use being transgender, and the fact the law protects you, as a weapon at your peril, because it’s about acceptance and collaboration.”

Mel added that being “true to yourself” is often not as “terrifying” as might be expected.

When she stepped down as Funway’s managing director in August 2019, Mel was again thinking about how she could help others.

“My life over the past 12 years as a transgender woman in travel has given me so much joy and happiness, now I’d like to give back and ‘give forward’, applying my business brain to do good,” she said at the time.

Mel’s professional legacy will be that of a passionate and productive advocate for sustainability and inclusivity. Social enterprise Charitable Travel, which she launched in 2020, is dedicated to investing in good causes and also encourages travellers to volunteer in-destination.

Her direct-sell operator Sustainable Journeys, meanwhile, focuses on mid-market holidays “with sustainability baked in” and making environmentally and ethically responsible travel more accessible.

Open heart, open mind

But I think Mel’s generosity will be her personal legacy, too.

I’m sorry I didn’t reach out to Mel more over the past few years. I went on maternity leave for 12 months in 2020, and again in 2023, and returned part-time while also moving away from my news role. But it’s no excuse.

I often saw her amusing Facebook updates about her beloved pets and would smile to myself. Why didn’t I comment on them to let her know I was thinking of her?

I know it’s common to wish we’d connected more with people when they suddenly pass, and I wish I was rediscovering my friendship with Mel under different circumstances – perhaps over another impromptu dinner at Sexy Fish in London’s Mayfair!

But what we can all do is take a leaf out of Mel’s book and stay in touch with our loved ones, meet people where they are, and go forward with an open heart and an open mind.

Rest in peace Mel, I hope you know how important you were to so many of us.

Jennifer Morris was TTG’s news editor from 2017 to 2022 and is now part of TTG’s partner content team.